Letter from Buea to Yaounde

Dear Ngwa,

I listened to you so well last time. Let’s stop pushing blame. We both are guilty of being off sometimes.

Ngwa, I laughed when I heard that 7,000 ghost workers have been found again on government pay roll, after the discovery of 14,000 ghost workers last year.

Who signs the ‘effective presence’ of these workers? Their bosses, of course! If the real ghost workers are to be punished, they should be punished alongside their bosses. Isn’t it said that it takes two to tango? It takes two, or more, Ngwa, for corruption to take place.

What is the maintenance policy of the regime you serve so loyally? The Buea- Kumba Road that was constructed with European citizens’ tax money has started getting bad. Right where the inauguration of the road took place, when Chief Inoni was PM, is really bad.

Remember that that is the place which took away the lives of two personalities; a lawyer and an administrator. If it were a Frenchman that died there, the very next day, that stretch would have been reconstructed by your Government.

Why is it that your regime has a very bad maintenance policy? Even things that are done and given to Cameroon, your regime cannot maintain them?

The road signs in Buea that were put before the 50 years of unification celebration or 53 years of unification, have all faded away. The zebra crossings have all been wiped off. Even though they are hardly respected by Buea drivers, especially taxi drivers.

Can you imagine that a taxi driver would stop on the zebra crossing to pick a passenger? I think I should start moving about with a ‘kassingurr’ like the famous Pa Nchumulu used to, so that if I find a taxi driver committing such an offence, I will give him five strokes of the Dr. Do Good as the Germans used to treat our grandparents.

You were talking last time about us creating our own currency. When the Ministers of ‘nkap’ met in Ngola, I thought they would take it as a major resolution. But can they? France will get very angry and sponsor the replacement of the ruler of any of its former colonies who dares to do that.

And that is why they are afraid. Or you think they don’t know?
Ngwa, are you sure that your head goat has not seen something coming that the rest of you are not seeing.

By the way he is going about with this his vision that he started seeing only after three decades, it seems he is foreseeing the new nation that will soon emerge. If you doubt me, which of his major projects is being carried out on this side of the Mungo? LomPangar, Memveele, Mbalam, Kribi and son on. Even the natural deep seaport that was commenced down in Victoria, he stopped it and turned his attention to La Republique.

I have told you to come and start a small project here, even an NGO here in Buea or up in Bamenda, you don’t want to. When the time comes, don’t tell us that you were forced to do what you guys are doing. It is neither good to be a fence sitter. The blood of fence sitters is always what is used in cleansing reconciliation or divorce. I have always said that unequivocal servitude is just another name of slavery.

Most of you guys are serving your king’s interest uncomplainingly in spite of what he is doing against the people. When the time comes, you will come and tell us that you were afraid that your head would roll. Lies! Lies, Ngwa. When the Professor of Medicine was the scribe of suffer-dong- finish, he used to zoom through your capital city with the green and white flag of his party fluttering and nothing happened to him. When the time came for him to become professor, did anybody block him?

So, you are nothing but cowards.

I hear the games of the big book schools are going to hold in that town of yours. Please, make sure that you guys put enough security measures in place. I hope it will not be a sex festival as was the case last time in Douala.
Sincerely yours
Mbella