Assimba: The fall of a hippopotamus

The population of Otoakam in Sangmelima, now understand that ‘it takes a whole village to raise a child’, as they woke up from sleep on Thursday, November 13, 2014, with a lake of crocodile tears after their Second degree traditional ruler, Mariologist and Josephologist left his throne without bidding farewell.

The electoral organ of the village has already started preparing for the next poll to replace their ruler, knowing very well that no human has entered Kondengui and come out free, except Bapes Bapes. On Wednesday, November 12, 2014, 70-year-old Mendo Ze, was grilled at the Special Criminal Court in Yaounde, before he was shipped to his brand new Kondengui cell.

I guess his last wish was to have a statue of the Virgin Mary in his private quarters. Prayers would be highly needed there because, last we checked; Inoni et al were attending a mass service in prison. Just 43 days from his 71st birthday (December 25), the freedom of the godfather of ‘La Voix du Cénacle’ was punctured just weeks after he thrilled the mourning crowd in Mvomeka, where Chantal was laying her mother’s mortal remains.

After spending 16 years at the helm of the CRTV, Mendo Ze was faxed to the Ministry of Communication as Minister Delegate from 2004-2007 to go and rest after grinding CRTV’s audiovisual tax like ‘arachides du village’.

Playwright, novelist, director and eminent Professor, Mendo’s mastery of literature was unmatched. His love affair with the Virgin Mary and Joseph is very logical given that he was born on 25 December.

In 2009, the Supreme State Audit, through the Budget and Finance Disciplinary Board, published a report stating that Mendo had swallowed tax payers’ money together with his colleagues and civil servants at the Ministry of Finance. The choir master allegedly disappeared with FCFA 2.6 billion and above.

Mendo, who was just practising our national sports, embezzlement, was also accused of swallowing much money concerning the alignment of the CRTV to the satellite. Apart from that, he was accused of 13 wrongdoings.

According to sources, the project ate much money and Mendo’s fingers were stained with blue bank notes. For nine years, Mendo had been parading the streets of Cameroon, free like Frida, before his capture. With his choir, he attended funerals, baptisms, first communion, but little did he know that when the Sparrow Hawk will take off, its claws will grab his over-sized coat first.

Cameroon civil servants would heave a sigh of relief after the announcement of the arrest of Mendo. Given that, on the payslip of each civil servant, the Government of Cameroon slashes a percentage for audiovisual tax. For them to be told that the man who single-handedly ate those taxes for 16 years is now behind bars, enjoying the new perfume he must get used to, calls for some boozing.

Paul Biya, when in Buea for the 52nd anniversary of the (Re)Unification of both Cameroons said; ‘better late than never’. Hence, all the years that Mendo spent free were not in vain. What did Mendo not do to be forgiven in the last nine years? His concert on November 6, celebrating his good friend’s 32 years was his last. Alas, justice had to follow its course.

If Biya did not send Ze to jail, many would have registered in the bibles of Biya’s shortcomings that, it was established that Ze ate more than he could digest and went free. So, the Etoudi landlord had to bring the choir master to book. Imagine that the choir he set up, ‘La Voix du Cénacle’, has entirely been funded by Cameroon’s treasury, and that members of the choir were paid three times better than a civil servant, not to talk about the 25,000 mushroom workers, then, you understand that Mendo was hearless.

The announcement of the arrest of Mendo rocked the nation’s capital. It was the word on every tongue. According to one school of thought, Mendo’s Kondengui visit marks the beginning of a series of high profile arrests that the President had ticked in his cleansing calendar. The FECAFOOT scandals, the Boko Haram Conundrum and the Bukina example were also points the Etoudi boss aimed at diverting attention from.

Another group posited that it is another political ploy by our enlightened leader not only to distract the people who are buying knives to go to the streets, but also dribble his political opponents and show the international community, how he lets justice take its course, no matter how slow it is. The less convincing people state that, Chantal, who has Mendo in her good books, had delayed the arrest to the point where she could not longer retain the Mvomeka landlord to drive the dagger to the heart.

Mendo’s example is proof that those in power are not worried about the future of children who are growing up. For one man to swallow FCFA 2.6 billion alone, tells you how greedy our managers are. And to think that, Mendo Ze could not make a sentence without mentioning the Virgin Mary, until at one point in time many thought he was the son of Mary. Mendo’s lack of patriotism is unmatched, and just like the others, he is reaping what he sowed.

But, faulty managers should not only be arrested. What is the impact of these arrests? Does it influence seating managers to avoid financial malpractices, corruption, bribery and embezzlement? Are the funds that they stacked in banks recovered? Kondengui is now packed to the rafters and more are on their way in. Let the forces that-be, inform us about the fallouts, especially positive, of the capture of these financial ‘boko harams’.

President Biya has not yet completed his government in Kondengui; he wants to complete the list of General Managers of State owned corporations. Kondengui, thus, has a new choir master; the singing competition in there will be groundbreaking.

Don’t be surprised that the Holy Mary that inhabitants of Yaounde spotted on the Nsimalen road may now be spotted in jail. Anyway, the prisoners have just been given a treat. They will all go to heaven. They shall be saved, maybe like Joseph in the Bible.